alternate title: uncertainty

The only thing we have to fear is fear itself
-Franklin D Roosevelt

My week at BC Children's Hospital doing Pediatric Urology was awesome. I learned some practical things (how to treat phimosis) and some not so practical things (how to do an epispadias repair). Actually, probably the most practical thing was that I got back in the swing of dictating notes again.

Anyhow, that's neither here, nor there. What is here is CaRMS interview season. It starts on tuesday when I do my Dalhousie interview and streeeeeches all the way to Feb 11th when I end with my Queen's interview in Kingston. This year, Dal is actually moving around and doing interviews in a variety of locations, including Vancouver. If we hadn't recently been to Halifax, I think I would be more keen on actually going there for the interview to suss it out, but for us, it's perfect that they are coming here. Also, Dalhousie isn't very high on our list, so it's nice that we get one warm up interview before UBC next weekend.

I've always had a problem with interview anxiety. I really shouldn't be that anxious, considering that Courtney and I are both good candidates, we would be happy doing our residency in a variety of different places, and we are both applying to family medicine, which along with with internal medicine and psychiatry, is not very competitive. People say that for Family Practice, it's really you that is going around and interviewing the programs, and that they should be trying to win you over. Unfortunately, however, I'm still nervous, which is bad, because what makes me nervous is that they will ask me a question that I won't have a good answer for. And when I'm nervous, I'm much more likely to blank out on a question. So it's a vicious cycle, or circle or whatever. It's not that I'm worried that I will screw everything up and have to live in northern manitoba for two years, it's just that moment of not being able to answer that is so excruciating for me.

In reality, the interviews will go fine. Some will be better than others, but there isn't too much I can do to change it. Right now I'm trying to forget about my interview fear and focus on the fact that this is a good excuse to fly around the country, see old friends and visit new places.

poaching lions

So this is the new year
and I don't feel any different.

-The New Year, Death Cab For Cutie

I went home again for the holidays this year. I again felt lucky to have such a nice place to go home to, and such nice people there to welcome me back. I had stuck around for a few extra days in Vancouver after classes ended and did some stuff with Courtney's family. I was driving home by myself on the 23rd, so I offered a ride on craiglist and found someone from Rossland who needed a lift.

At home, I managed to get in quite a few days up at Red Mountain, a day of cross country skiing and spent new years at our cabin on Christina Lake for the first time. I was lucky to be visited by my cousin Dante, his girlfriend Ashley and their dog Jasper. I hadn't seem him in a number of years, so it was cool that he was able to come for a visit. We were also visited by a few of our classmates who were in the area, and I had the privilege of showing them around the ski hill on sunny day. Courtney attempted to fly in Dec 29th, but (pretty much as can be expected in Cancelgar), was unable to due the weather. Luckily she was diverted to Cranbrook instead of being taken back to Vancouver and Air Canada even provided a charted bus to finish the trip. Needless to say it was great that she got in the same day she was trying to, and it was fun to have her see a Castlegar winter for the first time.

Tomorrow, I start a 2-week elective in Urology. I haven't done inpatient medicine in quite a while, heck, I haven't even seen a patient of any kind in a month and half, so I'm feeling a little rusty. I reviewed some basic urology, but if this is like any other surgical rotation, I'm probably in for a shock.

Interviews are rapidly approaching. Let me give you an idea of when I will be visiting you.

Jan 24/25-Calgary
Jan 26/27-Edmonton
Jan 29- Newfoundland
Feb 5- Ottawa
Feb 9- Toronto
Feb 11- Kingston

There may be a few more coming, but that is the core of the tour.

Here are some photos.

This is me in some fresh pow at Red.

The Merritt "Children"

Dante and I chillin' on the porch at the lake

Cortney (the boy) and I making a fresh start to the New Year.

The view from the walk in.

Courtney being herself

Compliments to Trisha for learning to use her new camera so quickly, and letting me have the files.